


just like a coaster

by vonseal



Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 15:27:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13126536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vonseal/pseuds/vonseal
Summary: bin was brave enough to ride tall roller coasters, but he wasn't brave enough to talk to lee dongmin. not until the heater broke, at least.





	just like a coaster

**Author's Note:**

  * For [danaboutphil](https://archiveofourown.org/users/danaboutphil/gifts).



> i was the secret santa of the wonderful [@dasha](http://www.blueberrybins.tumblr.com), someone i love very very much. im not the best at keeping up with asks or even of being online, but i still appreciate her SO SO SO much and i hope that this makes you smile, dasha!
> 
> even if christmas is mentioned, like, twice in this lmao. i suck at christmas fics.

There wasn't much that Moon Bin was afraid of.

He prided himself on being a beacon of strength and courage. Whereas others would run away, Bin faced the challenge head-on, steeled with pure determination. He killed spiders, he disposed of snakes, he rode front-seat on the fastest coaster at the theme parks he would frequent. When he got older, he dreamed of parachuting, of climbing a mountain, of hanging out in space for maybe a few days.

However, one thing frightened him, and that was Lee Dongmin.

It wasn't as if Dongmin was particularly frightening in any way. Sure, he was tall, but that was about _it_ in the Intimidation Factor. Other than that, he had clear, pale skin and cheerful eyes and a smile that lit up the entire room. His hair was dark and soft, bangs falling across his forehead, and his long, nimble fingers would often brush his bangs aside when they got too long. It was distracting to watch, making it difficult to talk to him.

Honestly, it was just difficult to talk to him in general.

Bin was hopelessly, _madly_ in love with Dongmin. He couldn't stand in his presence for more than a few seconds before he turned into a fumbling, ridiculous wreck. It was so embarrassing that he just gave up trying to speak to Dongmin.

But they were roommates in a small dorm. Their beds were hardly more than seven feet across from each other. Bin was constantly forced to wake up to the sight of Dongmin stretching, the early morning sunrise shining in through the blinds on their window, shedding light over his figure. He had to endure coming home after a grueling day of school and dance practice to Dongmin by his desk, typing out an essay onto his laptop, and he had to try and ignore the little flip-flops his stomach gave as the older boy shot him a soft smile. Worst, probably, was in the evening, when Dongmin started getting sleepy and would mumble reminders to himself that Bin should give him the following morning. Bin never did, on account that speaking to Dongmin was usually too frightening of a prospect, but Dongmin always seemed to remember them when he awoke, anyway. He would doze off, curling in on himself, usually pressed underneath clean sheets, and Bin would stare at him from _his_ bed, wondering how bad it would be to confess.

He would berate himself for such thoughts in the morning; and so began the entire process all over again.

His friends all knew of his idiotic crush, unfortunately. They liked to tease him for his fear of ever confessing to Dongmin – after all, they were all happily in their own relationships, having faced _their_ fears head-on.

(“Think of it like that stupid coaster you made me ride last year,” Sanha advised him once. “You told me to just get on and don't look back, and if regretted it later, at least I tried.”

“Some things can't be done like riding a coaster, Sanha,” came Bin's exasperated sigh. Jinwoo told him to shut up and stop being a drama queen.)

And, sometimes, there were certain things Dongmin did that made him all the more frightening, yet all the more irresistible. Like when he would shake Bin awake, singing out a soft, “Good morning, Bin, rise and shine!”

(Bin only screeched once. He controlled it from then on.)

Or when he would dress up nice, usually for an interview or a meeting with one of his professors, and he would look uncomfortable as he straightened his tie, usually asking, “Bin, do I look good?”

(Bin would never look – or, rather, he would never look _then_. He would simply nod mutely, and try to contain the scream rising up inside.)

Or when, on the night before Christmas, where he had wrapped himself in blankets and sat shivering on his bed.

It _was_ cold in the room, dreadfully so, but it didn't bother Bin, who had just come from practice and who was feeling quite warm just from noticing how adorable Dongmin was, a beanie pulled over messy hair and a nose that was red and runny.

“The heater broke,” Dongmin explained when he noticed Bin staring at him. “I'm cold.”

“Ah,” responded Bin intelligently. “Why don't you go to the common room?”

“It's late. And I'm tired.”

“Why don't you sleep?”

Dongmin raised his eyebrows. “I'm cold,” he repeated. “I can't sleep when I'm cold.”

(That explained why he liked to keep the room ridiculously warm.)

“So we're back to square one, then,” Bin murmured, and he ran his fingers through his sweaty hair. He wasn't sure what to do; Dongmin was staring at him expectantly, and all Bin _could_ do was shrug his shoulders and point to their bathroom. “I'll take a shower now,” he announced, though there was really no need to, considering he had announced such a thing _before_. For now, though, for some reason, it seemed like a good time to state what exactly he was going to be doing.

“Ri-Right,” Dongmin replied.

Bin didn't like how his teeth chattered. He also didn't know if Dongmin was just messing with him, or if he was _really_ that cold. He didn't mention it, however, choosing instead to quickly retreat to the bathroom, where he could shower in peace and pretend that nothing at all was wrong with him, that he _wasn't_ head-over-heels _in love_ with a man who was curled up on his bed, staring at him as if he could fix their broken heater somehow.

Which, Bin thought as he dried himself off, _should_ be fixed by a mechanic. He asked as much when he re-entered the bedroom. “Is someone going to fix the heat?”

Dongmin hadn't moved from his position, and Bin, clean from his shower and no longer hot and sweaty, finally realized just how cold it truly _was_. The heat must have been off for quite some time – he wondered if Dongmin had been enduring it all the while.

“They told me they would before midnight,” Dongmin mumbled, wrapping one of his blankets closer to himself.

Midnight wasn't _too_ much time to wait – sure, it might take an hour for the room to be fully heated once more, but Bin was fine with curling up under his own blankets and sleeping through the winter chill that was cutting through their room. He didn't have to be up tomorrow until he truly wanted to, anyway. Their Christmas break was short, but at least he had time to sleep in.

Dongmin, though, was naturally an early riser. By the time Bin woke up, even for classes at eight in the morning, Dongmin was almost always already long-gone. Bin had asked once, and supposedly he had classes at six most mornings.

(“On Sundays, too?” Bin asked, appalled at such early hours.

Dongmin shrugged his shoulders. “I wake up, anyway, and I can't go back to sleep, so I might as well start my day.”

Bin wondered why he fell in love with such a responsible man. That was highly unlike him.)

“Why don't you study? It might take your mind off the cold.”

“I'm too cold to move. Also, who studies on Christmas Eve?”

Bin sighed, though he couldn't help the smile that came across his face. “I thought you might. You're a weird guy, you know that?”

Dongmin eyed him curiously. “So are you,” he responded. “I think this is the most you've spoken to me all semester.”

Oh, right. He was supposed to be scared of Dongmin. Right. He cleared his throat and turned to his bed, flinging his covers back and smoothing out the sheets. “Sorry.”

“Don't...don't apologize.” Dongmin seemed nervous about something, and he gripped tighter at his blankets. “Do you hate me?”

“What?” Bin spun around, his eyes wide. “What makes you say _that?_ ”

“Well,” Dongmin started, “you ignore me, even when I try to talk to you, and you just...you don't seem to like me very much. I thought you hated me. I thought I had done something wrong.”

“I don't think _you_ could ever do anything wrong, Dongmin. I really li-”

He shut his mouth as quick as possible, trying to find some excuse to use to cover his slip-up. He was about to tell _Dongmin_ , scary, perfect Dongmin, that he _liked_ him. If he wanted rejection, that was an easy way to get it.

He didn't find a good enough excuse in time, however. Dongmin blinked, sniffed, and asked, “What were you going to say?”

“We're roommates,” Bin said, and gestured at the space between them. “That's all.”

Dongmin's face fell. “Oh,” he whispered, “because I thought maybe we could be friends.”

Bin didn't want to see Dongmin upset, and he _definitely_ didn't want to be the source of it. He turned fully from his bed and shuffled over to Dongmin's with a small smile. He prayed his cheeks weren't red.

And if they were, he would blame it on the cold.

“Friends, then,” he responded. “We're...we're friends.”

“Right,” Dongmin agreed. But he didn't seem _satisfied_. He bit at his lip and averted his eyes. Bin wondered what it was _he_ had said to make Dongmin behave so strangely all of a sudden. “I'm cold,” Dongmin mumbled.

“So you said.” Bin wished he could help – he wasn't sure what Dongmin wanted.

However, it was made clear with the older boy's next words. “I was reading up ways to get warm again.” Dongmin swallowed thickly, and he still refused to look up. “One of them, um, was by cuddling. A-And I know it sounds weird, I think it's weird, and so I understand if you think it's weird, but... _friends_ can cuddle, right? Not even because we-we _feel_ anything, because...you don't, and I don't, and we're just friends, but...if you're cold, um...” He trailed off, shrugging his shoulders uselessly.

It was such a strong request, such a _bold_ request. It was the sort of request that reminded Bin of facing a scary coaster – feet shuffling, hands shaking, and yet there is so much _determination_ , so much desire, to ride the coaster; and at the end, maybe it ended well and maybe it ended bad, but it's _done_ , the relief of having finished and the excitement, the beating heart, that still remains, despite feet being firmly planted on solid ground.

Bin wonders if Dongmin feels like he just faced a coaster.

Was the ending to it good or bad? Was it like Sanha, where he threw up in the nearby trash can? Or was it like Bin, where he pumped his fists in jubilation?

Bin realized suddenly that the ending to Dongmin's coaster fell solely on his shoulders.

And, god, Bin wanted to cuddle. It was such a frightening prospect, but when he looked at how vulnerable and fragile Dongmin had become, it didn't seem so bad to accept. It was _Dongmin_ that had taken that step, that had decided it must be done. Bin was just there for the ride. He was there to grasp onto Dongmin's hand and agree that it was a coaster that must be faced.

“Coasters are more fun when both people are determined,” Bin commented.

Dongmin's eyebrows furrowed, clearly getting an answer he hadn't expected. “E-Excuse me?”

“Move over.” Bin climbed onto the bed with no further warning. Dongmin scooted, a little cautiously, but still opened up his blanket.

Dongmin was warm, despite complaining of the cold. Bin tucked the blanket into both of them the best he could, his shoulder and side pressed flush against Dongmin. It _was_ quite awkward at first; Bin was reminded of a steep hill to climb.

Coasters were far more relaxing after the first initial upwards battle.

So Bin leaned further into his touch, feeling Dongmin tense beside him, and he poked his shoulder.

“Dongmin?”

“Um, yes?”

“Do you know how long I've wanted to be like this?”

Dongmin relaxed suddenly, and he grinned; Bin couldn't exactly see it, but he could feel it in Dongmin's next words: “Really, Bin?”

“Every night,” Bin whispered, “I tell myself, _tomorrow, I'll tell him that...that I like him_.”

“I _knew_ you were going to say that before!” Dongmin exclaimed. “I _heard_ it almost come out, but you chickened out and so _I_ decided to make the first move-”

“I didn't _chicken out_. I just decided that _now_ was a better time to say it.”

Dongmin laughed; his voice was deep and rich and Bin wanted to hear more of it.

“But...but, Bin, why were you talking about _coasters?_ What was-”

“Shh, just don't ask what goes on inside of my mind ninety-five percent of the time, and I think all of this will work out together.”

“All of _what_ will work out together?”

“Feelings? Emotions? Obvious mutual romance that neither of us decided to express until just now?”

Dongmin giggled lightly. “Well,” he commented, “I think Christmas is the perfect time to confess.”

“One, _you_ didn't really confess, and two, Christmas is tomorr-”

“Shh.” Now it was Dongmin's turn to shush Bin, and he did so by nudging him lightly with his shoulder. “Let's not get technical, Bin. I just want to get warm.”

“Oh.” Bin smiled over at Dongmin. “Are you warm?”

Dongmin nodded in enthusiasm. “Very,” he responded.

He really wasn't frightening at all, really, not when he fell asleep against Bin's shoulder at sometime before midnight, not when they awoke tangled in each other's arms and drool was caked to the side of his mouth, and _definitely_ not when he gave Bin's cheek a small kiss before hurrying out of the dorm.

There was _nothing_ , Bin realized, that he was afraid of anymore.

 

**Author's Note:**

> hmu with some christmas snuggles [@vonseal](http://www.vonseal.tumblr.com).


End file.
